15. “Success isn’t always about greatness. It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.” ~ Dwayne Johnson
Consistent hard work
Consistency is regularly taking action in a similar way, and I believe taking consistent right actions is voting for the identity of the person you wish to become. I used to think consistency is something you’re either good at or you’re not. I also thought hard work meant I had to put my nose to the grindstone and it would be painful somehow. Because of those assumptions, I had avoided it throughout my life. I believed I didn’t have what it took to be consistent, steady and regularly endure hard work. I used to do the bare minimum, I coasted, and I hardly took any risks. It is partly connected to not feeling good enough and also to my fear of success and self-sabotaging tendency. Internally, I felt anxious, unfulfilled, dissatisfied and I constantly had the feeling that something was missing.
A desire to be consistent
I always wanted to be a consistent person who had self-discipline. I admired those who could stick to good routines and habits and achieve amazing results in a short amount of time. It seemed like a distant dream until quite recently. I learned the skill of consistency when I began weight training. Because I was learning a new skill of lifting heavy weights, I needed to go slowly to avoid injury. In order to progress, I needed to also go consistently, not to expect quick results, or give up so soon after starting. It’s not the kind of sport you can hurry, it’s the kind that makes you focus and be patient. I had to train my body to lift heavier incrementally and train my mind to show up, and not give up. This was very important if I wanted to be healthy, fit and strong. Over time, I have been transferring this skill to other areas of my life.
When we do something consistently, it becomes a habit. For example, if our goal is to spend quality time with our partner, then we could work on being more present and less distracted on our phone. When we practise being present consistently, the quality of our connection increases significantly which our partner will feel, because we pay attention to them wholeheartedly, not half-heartedly. Our concentration and attention span are also likely to develop and we can focus for longer periods on our partner in front of us. Perhaps you decide to consistently put your phone away in another room when you’re with your partner. That will have a huge positive impact on the relationship because you're signalling to your partner that they are your priority in that moment.
Consistency is an investment in ourselves
I believe consistency in personal and professional development serves us well, in particular consistently working on our emotion regulation, self-talk, mindset, reflection and in our relationships, because when we practise daily, we’re signalling to ourselves that it’s important and we’re worth investing in. We’re showing up for ourselves which builds our self-confidence, belief and trust. This skill has been one of the most important skills that pay dividends in the long term. Personally, consistency with the fundamental habits (nutrition, movement and sleep) and mindset have enhanced my levels of focus, energy, patience, resilience, stability, a sense of purpose, validation and progression. It’s empowering to be self-sufficient in providing all this for myself and no longer wait for others to validate me. Taking ownership of intentional and consistent action steps has enabled me to feel in control of my circumstances, it has also settled and stabilised my mind to trust the process and trust myself to handle any situation.
A desire to work hard
This concept was alien to me for a long time, because I was questioning why anyone would choose to work super hard, if there’s an easier way and I was clearly avoiding it. Pursuing the easy route is no longer worth it to me because it cost me a great deal of time and made me more anxious. Now I choose to work hard and be consistent with it at the same time, even though sometimes it is overwhelming and I ask myself why. I remind myself then that it’s because I find it very rewarding and fulfilling when I do my best, work hard and give it my all.
How to build the skill of consistency:
Recognise where you’re at currently. It’s okay that you’re not consistent all the time. It’s a skill and you can develop it. Ask yourself why you want to develop this skill. If your ‘why’ is powerful enough, you’re more likely to stick with it when the going gets tough.
Start small. Pick something that you want to be able to do and break it down to the smallest first step. For example, you want to eat better and your smallest first step could be to add a portion of veggies to your plate at dinner time.
Do this for two weeks, until it becomes your new normal and it feels strange not to do it. Remember to celebrate yourself for being consistent!
If you skip one day, it’s okay, figure out why you skipped it. The next day, get back on track and continue. There’s no need to give up or be hard on yourself. But do not allow yourself to skip more than one day.
What is your mind telling you? Listen out for sabotaging language, such as “You skipped a day! You might as well give up! You can’t be consistent, who are you kidding!” Take note of these because there is usually a pattern. When you hear it, label it as a sabotaging pattern and tell yourself it doesn’t mean it’s true.
Build on your progress by adding another step. With the example of eating better, you might substitute a biscuit with a fruit, a burger with a salad, a soft drink with water. You might reduce the amount of sugar you add to your favourite hot drink. Repeat this daily for another two weeks.
Every time you feel you can’t or don’t want to stick to your plan, remind yourself of your ‘why’.
Some people find these strategies helpful: tracking their food intake, journaling when you fall off track, having an accountability partner, doing it with a friend. They are powerful as well as helpful because what you track can be measured.
Measure your progress backwards from Day 1 and celebrate yourself, with or without your accountability partner!
Challenge yourself to do more to build on your progress. Once it becomes a habit, you’ll notice it becomes easier to continue, it’s your new routine and your new identity as a healthy person.
Let’s recap:
Consistency is a skill which means it can be developed and if practised over time, it can be improved.
Consistency is an action-oriented building block of habit formation; it improves by doing, not thinking.
Learning the consistency skill is an investment in ourselves; it is one of the most important and useful skills that pays dividends in all areas of our lives.
Now over to you:
What will you start practising consistently?
How will you celebrate when you are being consistent?
Will you encourage a friend to do this with you?
Until the next issue, take good care of yourself and your loved ones,
Ikuko 💌